June Ask

I haven't done one of these for June yet!

Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?
When I was a child, I used to feel like I wasn't real sometimes.

On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?
1.

If you were a type of tree, what would you be?
I'd love to be an American beech, Fagus grandifolia. Hardly a more majestic tree in any forest.

When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?
Damn, I need to get more sleep.

What shirt are you wearing?
A black t-shirt with a pocket.

What do you label yourself as?
Human being. Child of God. Catholic Christian. Southern American.

Bright room or dark room?
Bright room, high ceilings.

What were you doing at midnight last night?
Sleeping.

Favorite age you’ve been so far?
30. Life keeps getting better, even when it gets harder.

Who told you they loved you last?
My mom.

Your worst enemy?
Myself.

What is your current desktop picture?
A plain blue background.

The last song you listened to?
"Opie's Funeral Song" by Sufjan Stevens

You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
I would make myself absolute monarch and establish Catholicism as the state religion.

What was your last dream about?
I don't know but it was good.

Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?
Yes, for my two salivary gland removals.

Have you ever built a snowman?
Yes. The Infamous Blizzard of 1993.

What is the color of your socks?
I'm wearing Chacos; i.e. no socks.

What type of music do you like?
Baroque solo instrumental music, mostly.

Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
Sunrise. I feel so good for waking up to see it.

Do you have any scars?
I have a few. The most noticeable is the one on my neck.

How long could you go without talking?
A few days.

What do you like on your toast?
Butter and preserves or marmalade.

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?
Yes, in 8th grade.

What was your last text message?
Hey, thanks -----!

What do you see yourself doing in 10 years?
I'd like to be self-employed or doing simple manual labor or both.

What was your favorite 90s show?
Seinfeld.

Have you ever been stood up?
Yes. Not on a date, though.

Your favorite pair of shoes?
My Vivobarefoot desert boots, or my Chacos.

What is your favorite fruit?
Watermelon. I've eaten watermelon almost every day for the past year.

Your fears?
Being a dumb/fake/pusillanimous person.

What is something most people don't know about you?
I enjoy hugs. 

What makes you feel the happiest?
A friendly glance with an authentic smile.

What store do you shop at most often?
Publix

Do you believe in karma?
I believe in a perfectly just and merciful God. And I believe what Jesus said - that the measure with which we measure will be the measured back to us.

Are you single?
No, celibate.

Do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?
I don't give flowers to say sorry; I give flowers to say, "You matter a great deal to me."

Are you a competitive person?
In a quiet way, yes; especially with myself.

Do you like dancing?
I don't like dancing in public. I like dancing at home.

What kind of music to you listen to?
Mostly Baroque and Sufjan Stevens lately.

Eat at home or eat out?
I like both. Sometimes I like to eat out just to be around a lot of people.

How much more social are you when you're drunk?
I usually get tired and say stupid things when I drink, or get quieter.

How many hours do you sleep at night?
Sometimes as little as 5 or 6, depending on the night.

Are you happy with yourself?
Happy with myself? I consider self-satisfaction a character flaw and a spiritual blindness, so any time I catch myself doing it I try to eradicate it. But this is different than loving oneself, or seeing oneself as lovable, both of which are necessary for holiness, I think.

What do you wish you didn't know?
Every time I hear gossip I regret hearing it.

What's your favorite Website?
YouTube, maybe.

What's the habit you're proudest of breaking?
I quit Diet Coke completely for two years. Now, I drink it sometimes, but moderately. I still want to quit again.

If you had to teach a subject to a class, what would it be?
Latin or horticulture.

Favorite kind of chips?
Tortilla chips, especially blue corn. I also love those chips made from black beans called Beanitos.

What's the most memorable class you've ever taken?
A world lit class in college with a Macedonian teacher. He was insanely funny. I'll have to write about his asshole metaphor sometime. 

What's your favorite breakfast?
Fried potatoes. Bacon and eggs.

Do you like guacamole?
I LOVE guacamole. I eat it several times a week.

Favorite city you've been to?
Melbourne, Australia. Or Chicago.

Favorite day of the week?
Thursday.

How do you feel about porn?
A degrading, destructive, and diabolical force in the world which ought to be eradicated.

Which living celebrity would you like to know?
Pope Benedict XVI, if he counts.

What is your favorite word?
Anything in Latin. I love how Latin sounds. A favorite Latin word: quoque. Or anything ending in -ibus.

How do you feel about tattoos?
I would never have one. I don't like them, unless it is a small or inconspicuous one.

How tall are you?
5'11"

How old are you?
31

3 physical features you get complimented on a lot?
My beard, my legs, my voice.

Do you believe in love at first sight?
Yes, but love takes time to perfect.

What are some words that you live by? Why?
Esse quam videri - to be, rather than to seem to be. Because I'm a Catholic, not a nihilist.

Enchanting Ghost

Dreamy and sad. Raw and heartbroken.

Filler Noise

When I was out of town a few weeks ago, I attended Mass at a local parish. At the beginning of Communion, the cantor approached the microphone and told us, "Our Communion hymn will be 687 and 686 if we need to."

I laughed on the inside at the absurdity of this statement in regard to its attitude towards silence in the liturgy. What need is there for hymn 686? Obviously, it is in case Communion takes too long, and we need more music to fill up the time so that there won't be any silence. The same concept is played out in my home parish, where sometimes verses of a hymn are repeated or omitted, to make sure the song is the length required to take up all of the available space.

In the old Mass, passed down to us from the Fathers, there is no music to take up space. Everything that has to be sung is sung. Omissions are not allowed and repeats are unnecessary. If the priest takes "too little" time with his actions, he'll have to wait for the music to end before he can continue. At a polyphonic Mass, this may mean that the priest sits down and listens for a few minutes. On the other hand, if the priest's actions take longer than the music lasts, there is just stillness and silence. And that's okay. 

For all of its ancient and medieval holdovers, which refuse to submit to the rationalism and pragmatism of post-Enlightenment, Modern man, the old Mass is remarkably simple in many ways. One of these is that there's nothing there just to take up space, nothing spoken or sung for the purpose of ensuring a constant influx of noise and movement. Sometimes one finds oneself sitting still with no noise and nobody moving around or talking or anything. And that's okay.

I was reminded of this when I was reading from Romano Guardini's Meditations Before Mass, written before the liturgical reforms: 

Lengthy, unbroken singing is objectionable, as is continuous organ music, which drives stillness from its last possible refuge. In the course of these meditations we shall see that the periods of silence are not mere interruptions of speech and song, but something essential to the sacred act as a whole and almost as important as the periods of speech.

The Holy Mass was, at one time, the last vestige of stillness and sacredness left in the communal life of Western Civilization. Even now this has corroded into more noise and more moving about - the last thing we needed more of.

June Afternoon

I took some photos in the arboretum recently.

Pycnanthemum muticum, one of the native mountain-mints. Attracts droves of pollinators all summer long.

Lonicera sempervirens, coral honeysuckle. This is one of our native honeysuckles, much less robust but more elegant than the invasive Japanese honeysuckle (the one with the yellow and white flowers we kids used to love picking and sucking on)

Another shot of the coral honeysuckle. As you can imagine, hummingbirds love this flower.

Bignonia capreolata, crossvine, another Southern native vine. This plant loves to scale pines and other tall trees. One usually only sees the flowers as they fall and scatter on the bed of pine needles below.

Aclepias tuberosa, butterfly-weed. This is one of the milkweeds, which are hosts to monarch butterflies.

Butterfly-weed closeup.

Echinacea purpurea, purple coneflower. One of our most well-known U.S. wildflowers. Some of the other species are used in herbal medicine.

A carnivorous pitcher plant, probably a hybrid or cultivar (Sarracenia species). These are related to Venus flytrap and also catch insects to supplement their nutrition. Unlike Venus flytrap, it has no moving parts. The insect flies into the pitcher, attracted by the smell of nectar, and gets trapped by downward-facing hairs which push the victim down into a digestive fluid at the base. The white spots on the pitchers are false-windows, further confusing insects in search of a way out.